Stuck between the moon and New York City

Memorial crash site, Flight 93, Pennsylvania

<a

Irish Fest, Milwaukee. It was all a bit reminiscent of this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lM7KDGautpY

Edison’s house, New Jersey. The more I know of Edison the more I think he was a prick. To prove how dangerous A/C electricity was he electrocuted an elephant. The name of the elephant executed was “Topsy” and she was a “bad” elephant who had been condemned to die for having killed three men. Apparently the Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Animals approved of the execution, since they thought it would be inhumane to hang Topsy. Hang? Really? He then wanted to show that high voltage D/C electricity could kill humans. To do this, Edison convinced the State of New York to switch from hanging its condemned inmates, to electrocuting them. He argued that this method of execution was more humane. Apparently this didn’t go well and took eight minutes and took two attempts. On the second attempt the prisoner caught fire. One observer said it would have been more humane if they took to him with an axe.

Not only do you have to be reminded that texting while driving is not a good idea, in New York they provide special text areas where you can stop and send your SMS to an impatient breathless world.

Time to go. I ask a lass in a bar in Morristown New Jersey how long it will take me to drive the 38 miles to JFK. “Oh, about an hour, it is Sunday. She asks another chappie, “be safe give yourself an hour and a half”. It takes me 4 hours and twenty minutes. To drive 38 miles (60 km). At one stage I get lost as there are a number of detours and Jill doesn’t really understand detours. I see a shelter of some description with a big sign saying “are you lost?” with a young man in uniform standing outside of it. I wind down the window, “Well I’m lost”. Him “where do you want to go” Me “Jfk” Him “Airport?” Me “Yeah”. He seems genuinely incredulous, “Umm go up here and then do a U turn and then…… and……..then”. It was like the old joke about the man getting lost in Ireland and pulls over and asks a local how to get to Donegal to which the local replies “Well I wouldn’t start from here”. At this stage a bus pulls up and he begs off saying “I have to catch this bus”. He wasn’t a directions person, just a dude waiting for a bus. You are supposed to pick up the phone and get directions. Bugger that. I turn off Jill and keep driving hoping for the best. I eventually get there (after spending an hour going through the Lincoln Tunnel that is only three miles long). The plane is delayed for a couple of hours, so that’s OK. On the flight to LAX the pilot tells us there will be no further delay. When we get to LAX there is an hour and half delay. Two young blokes and I decide to repair to the bar. “I’ll have a scotch, actually make it a double” “Certainly sir. That will be $25”. $25 plus tip is over $34 dollars Australian. I could have bought two bottles of scotch in Nebraska for that. Now I really do need that drink.

A shitful flight, but finally home. And same as the last time some reactions to the blog.

Daughter “Yeah Dad, I enjoyed it. I’ve been busy so I didn’t read all of it”.

Gerard “What is the point of it?”

Mikey “I read that blog. It is just shit”.

Scene: Lower Plenty – Me “Well, I figured it out, this time was 11,669 kilometres, 1733 golf shots and 21 states in 42 days taking it up to 37 states done”. Wife “Good for you dear”.

To be continued in 2015.